There are things I don't like on a Saturday morning, as soon as I wake up, especially when they are linked, like in the list below
1. Hearing news that wife's grand mother passed away
2. which meant Impromptu travel
3. to a village
4. with no internet and long power cuts
5. or western amenities for attending nature calls of the second kind
6. in mid summer when temperatures are soaring at 46C
The result is you end up going to the funeral of your FIL's mother, a lady with whom you have not quite established a "functional relationship" owing to multiple circumstantial constraints which are not on agenda for this post. Now don't get me wrong, I have utmost respect for the elderly, the departed and the elderly that departed. My FIL has four daughters and I married the third one. In any ordinary circumstance my presence over there wouldn't be noticed but in this particular case, where all the other three daughters are settled in US and I being the only RI son-in-law, and that place being a village, everybody who isn't anybody would ask "where are your daughter (Number 3) and son-in-law (Number 3)?". So half owing to the respect for the departed and half owing to the obligation of being present, we set out on this journey.
I can't write everything that happened there, but here are the highlights.
1. Do you know how it feels when fire is set all around and the hot air from it is blown all over you? I do.
2. I saw people everywhere but recognize only a couple. I spent most of the time trying to be around those couple of people.
3. The average conversation with the people I knew lasted... 2 minutes.
4. There are people who came and asked me if I can guess who they are. I resisted saying " Oh I love this game, but you have to tell me if its one word or two words!!!!"
5. Then I got introduced to a lot of people and I still don't have a clue.
6. Everybody who met me wanted to know What I did for a living.
7.I tried to explain my line of work to a bunch of them and their reaction even before I went into details was "Ohh Software aaa!!!. Never was I more embarrassed to mention my line of work.
8.The next question "Why aren't you in America, like other son-in-laws?", before I could answer, some NRI parents (parents of NRIs), debated among themselves, came to a conclusion and recommended that I "talk" with their kids in US, so that they can see if I too can get a "Chance". Did I already type, how I was never more embarrassed to mention my line of work, cut it from there and paste it here.
9. Then somehow I was made responsible (not just me, the IT industry which I am part of) for the hike in prices, high cost of living, change in lifestyle, increase in divorce rates etc etc. Some people got to live that day because, killing is illegal. and I am taught to respect elders.
10. I got to sleep in somebody's house that has air conditioning. As soon as I fell asleep, the power went off and only returned the next morning.
11. We left the following day only to return for the 11th day ceremony.
12.Only this time the fire was set under you and you get the feeling of slowly turning into tandoori chicken.
13. About 2000 people attended the lunch that is given.
14. While I was eating, the sun positioned himself such that you could make a freaking omlette on by back.
Now you must be wondering how does the title fit into this entire story. That is for you to figure out.
